“Oh for Christ’s sake Sammy, the dogs are barking in that direction, why are you looking in that direction and barking! You’re such a fucktard, I swear!”

“Bugger I’m talking to the dog!” 

Bugger I’m talking to myself! Shut it…sigh…

The prospect of getting back into the workforce is actually looking appealing now, if anything to allow me the opportunity to talk to humans as opposed to the Schizo Shitzu, whom I take on regular walks in order to avoid mid-morning cigarette cravings.

 

 Pretending not to understand when I ask him to vacate my bed

He is adorable even though he’s a royal pain in the ass. He’s taken to sleeping with me since the sibling is on spring break and he breaks into the most unearthly howls in the night. Probably dreaming of doing unmentionable things to the ravishing toy poodle who lives in the front house and stares dreamily if a bit vacantly into our house all day. Yes, yes I’m a sentimental fool when it comes to dogs, its been years since I’ve had to deal with one, well the four legged ones (since most of my friends have been described as such at one time or another as for that matter, have I). I’m sure going to miss the loony pooch when the sibling moves in May but at least life will be a bit more peaceful.