stolen from here
You know what’s really annoying about being a generation Y’er (only realized I was one recently thanks to Hira)? It’s the rest of the family telling you what to do, what they think you should do. For fucks sakes I’m having enough trouble summoning up the courage to do what needs to be done from my viewpoint, as opposed to decamping to a hut on a hill in a tropical island with a wholesale account with the nearest arrack producer. Having to be lectured on and off by the baby boomers and WWI’s is really pushing me to breaking point.
Having to deal with the ‘serious’ talks and phone calls from distant shores with opinions as to how you should live your life is getting increasingly difficult to handle. Especially because the advice comes from people who love you and in their minds want what’s best for you. Not exactly candidates for the phrasing that I use when people piss me off, i.e. ‘go fuck yourself.’ Instead all I can do is grit my teeth, worsening my already bad grinding problem, nod my head, bite back the smarmy comments and mumble “ok, ok” to pretty much everything.
I think I need a drink, a very stiff one.
In from one ear, out from the other, smile and nod your head enthusiastically and gushingly thank them for their advice. Go into zombie-mode and just ignore whatever they’re saying but don’t show it. Glazed eyes and all that. I’m sure you’ll master the art of pretending to care soon enough:D
Comment by Darwin — March 17, 2007 @ 9:31 am
I can relate to this post. I created quite a furore when coming from a family of doctors, I decided to do Arts for my AL’s. My parents were the only people who supported me from baby boomers and WWI’s. Everyone else had something to say and for the sake of my parents I couldn’t ask them to fuck themselves but heated arguments ensued nevertheless. Lol. But apparently law is now good enough so apart from occassional advice on which career path to choose, it doesn’t happen to me anymore.
You know what you can do? Come up with a job that will really disturb them, y’know on the emergency family meeting, plans to fly over there to save you from the mistake you are about to make, level. And then say that you changed your mind and decided to stick with your job. Maybe, just maybe the relief will be of such a great magnitude that they will let you off the hook.
Or am I on the wrong track here?
Is this about marriage proposals? LOL cos I know quite a few people suffering from that problem. Oh now that would be priceless.
This is one long comment.
Comment by sach — March 17, 2007 @ 10:14 am
Join the club. Consider yourself lucky…I have my parents telling me how to do my PhD! I thought no one else was supposed to understand what I was doing? :S
“Drink through it” is the motto most of my friends follow. I tend to forget what’s been said the second I keep the phone down…and make sure I’ve made some progress before the next time they call, just so I can appease them temporarily. If they think you’re making the effort to listen to them (even though you’re probably not), maybe they’ll ease up a bit? I dunno, depends on the people.
Comment by PseudoRandom — March 17, 2007 @ 10:46 am
man.. Its a killer when I go my way, screw up & then they say “we told U, din’t we”. Its a gamble. according to situation, make the decision. Good Luck u’l make it !!
Comment by dogfight — March 19, 2007 @ 3:26 am
yeah sounds familiar.. i don’t answer those 4n calls, caller id what a brilliant invention !! i have learnt that no matter how many ppl are ‘there’ for you when things are bad u just hv to figure things out for urself and do it ur way in ur own time.. at least that way u can’t blame others when things go wrong
just keep telling urself ‘things can only get better’
Comment by savi3 — March 19, 2007 @ 6:49 pm
Darwin – that’s what I’ve been doing for awhile now, I just wish it got easier.
Sach – hehe…no its not related to proposals….actually you might be onto something there. I’m assuming they can’t get me married off to anybody (and as I rather shockingly discovered, they have a couple of girls in mind) because I’m such a joker.
I think its actually the lack of a job, at least a long term job that worries them. Theirs is a generation that’s used to long term stable jobs, I think my job hopping is a bit hard for them to fathom, that combined with my going out habits, etc, etc…I think the grandparents have had a hard time handling the ‘sowing of oats’ stage. The weird thing is relative to most people in my family I’m actually fairly straight shooting, yet I still get a shit load of hassle.
And I still get the ‘doctor’ guilt trip, especially from the extended family and they remain unmoved even when I point out I have the compassion of a disgruntled Indian cricket fan. I don’t think most of the fam can fathom what an environmental scientist is.
Pseudorandom – I just ascribe to what Darwin suggested, not sure how to make them think I’m making the effort without losing my noodle myself. I reckon advice on how to do a PhD would be pretty annoying though, especially one in a fairly incomprehensible (and I mean that as a compliment) as yours?!
Dogfight – wonder what happens when we do it their way and it doesn’t work out? Should have worked harder or something similar is what is said…blah
Savi3 – ‘things can only get better’ hehe…that my girl is my mantra…I should have that tattooed somewhere on me, maybe in mayan or something so it at looks cool
Comment by childof25 — March 20, 2007 @ 3:44 am